At last, a clear out! But first…

1. Sabrina Carpenter – “Please Please Please”

Returning to number 1 for a fourth week, after a fortnight at number two when it was stuck behind Sabrina Carpenter’s “Espresso”. No doubt some fascinating record has been broken about being the first person to knock herself off number one twice in a row. “Espresso” gets hit by the downweighting rule this week, and drops straight to number 9.

4. Jimin – “Who”

He’s a member of BTS. This is his third solo appearance in the top 40; “Like Crazy” got to number 8 last year. It’s a surprisingly high position considering that last month’s single, “Smeraldo Garden Marching Band”, only got to number 46. The parent album “Muse” is out this week, but it doesn’t make the albums top 40; apparently some of the formats weren’t chart eligible.

7. JADE – “Angel of my Dreams”

This is the debut solo single from Little Mix’s Jade Thirlwell, though officially we’re meant to call her JADE now. Little Mix solo projects have had patchy success so far. Jesy Nelson’s first single made number 4 in 2021, and she never managed a follow-up. Leigh-Anne Pinnock’s solo debut got to number 11, but her last single missed the top 75. Perrie Edwards got to number 10 with her debut earlier this year, and then the follow-up bombed at 69. So the omens aren’t good.

Nor is it hugely encouraging to read that “Angel of my Dreams” is a song about her feelings about the music industry, sampling Sandie Shaw’s “Puppet on a String”. So I played this for first time with some trepidation.

It turns out to be a hybrid of Billie Eilish and Lady Gaga, except topped and tailed with a sickly mock-ballad segment which is the only place you’ll find the Sandie Shaw sample. And that sample turns out to be just the opening note as a repeated off-key wail. In audio form, the main body of the song is pretty commercial (though radio will hate that opening), but the video turns it into an absolute fever dream. The idea is that the music industry guy keeps replacing her with newer and younger Jades, basically, but that really doesn’t convey how weird this video is.

Leigh-Anne and Perrie’s solo releases were essentially more of the same, and this is certainly not more of the same. Oh, and the video is a crossover with the video for “Starburster” by Fontaines DC, which came out three months ago, and must have baffled their audience at the time.

23. Charli XCX – “Apple”

Could Charli XCX finally be approaching the sort of relevance that people have always claimed for her? “360” also rebounds this week, from 29 to a new peak of 18. The album is at number 6 this week, and it’s yet to leave the top 10 after 7 weeks.

(By the way, the video above has a not-very-prominent seizure warning.)

30. Stray Kids – “Chk Chk Boom”

More K-pop. Stray Kids just missed the top 40 last year with “Lalalala” but make it over the line this time, perhaps because of the Deadpool & Wolverine link.

34. Dominic Fike – “Misses”

Fike had a number 3 hit in 2019 with “3 Nights”, but this is the first time we’ve had him in the singles top 40 since then. “3 Nights” has completely vanished from my memory. I’m not sure what this is doing in the chart – it’s a track from his EP “14 minutes” which, unusually, has a single video for the entire album. It’s just a video of him running along a road, so don’t get too excited. “Misses” itself is only about 75 seconds long – it starts at about 10.30 in the video above.

38. Eminem – “Brand New Dance”

Another album track, swapping places with “Renaissance” to take the third slot this week. “Habits” drops from 11 to 36, while lead single “Houdini” is still at number 6.

40. Majestic, Jammin Kid & Celine Dion – “Set My Heart on Fire (I’m Alive x And The Beat Goes On)”

This is a mash-up of Celine Dion’s single “I’m Alive” (number 17 in 2002) and the Whispers’ “And The Beat Goes On” (number 2 in 1980). It seems to have started life as a TikTok fragment posted by Jammin Kid, with Majestic’s role being to turn that into an actual full-length single. Since the Whispers don’t get a credit, I’m assuming their sample was re-recorded in the process. Majestic has charted before – his remix of Boney M’s “Rasputin” reached number 11 in 2021.

Celine Dion hasn’t had a hit single since 2013, but she can now claim a top 40 hit in the 1990s, 2000s, 2010s and 2020s.

This week’s climbers are, for once, plentiful:

• “Birds of a Feather” by Billie Eilish climbs to 2 now that “Espresso” is out of the way – despite not being an official single, it hasn’t been out of the top 5 since its second week on release.
• “Good Luck Babe” by Chappell Roan climbs 6-3 – it previously peaked at number 4 three weeks previously. It’s been in the top 40 for 15 weeks now.
• “Stargazing” by Myles Smith climbs 7-5. It’s been hovering between 6 and 7 for the last six weeks.
• “Kisses” by Bl3ss, CamrinWatsin and Bbyclose climbs 24-13.
• “Slow it Down” by Benson Boone climbs 18-14; it reached number 15 for the first time in June.
• “Kehlani” by Jordan Adetunji climbs 21-17.
• “360” by Charli XCX climbs 29-18; it previously peaked at 27 in mid-June.
• “Move” by – deep breath – Adam Port, Stryv, Keinemusik, Orso & Malachiii climbs an impressive 39-25.

There are seven new entries, plus two re-entries in the low 30s. The nine records leaving the top 40 are:

• “3 Lions” by David Baddiel, Frank Skinner & The Lightning Seeds, which was number 8 last week, drops straight out of the top 40 with the football over. (Oddly, Bruce Springsteen’s “Dancing in the Dark” hangs on for a second week at 37.)
• “Renaissance” by Eminem is disqualified under the three-song rule after a single week at 13 – it would have been outside the top 40 anyway, though.
• “Belong Together” by Mark Ambor had 16 weeks, peaking at 11.
• “Cruel Summer” by Taylor Swift had six weeks in its current run, peaking at 13.
• “Lunch” by Billie Eilish had two weeks at number 2 and 10 weeks on chart.
• “Scared to Start” by Michael Marcagi had 25 weeks in the top 40, peaking at number 9 months ago.
• “Chihiro” by Billie EIlish entered at 7 and hung around for 9 weeks.
• “Fortnight” by Taylor Swift featuring Post Malone was a number 1 with 13 weeks on chart.
• “Tough” by Quavo & Lana Del Rey had two weeks, peaking at 32.

On the album chart, “The Death of Slim Shady (Coup de Grace)” by Eminem is number 1 for a second week.

3. Soft Play – “Heavy Jelly”

Fourth album by the duo previously known as Slaves. The previous three all made the top 10, but this is their highest position.

6. Glass Animals – “I Love You So F***ing Much”

The asterisks are in the official title. This is their fourth album and the follow-up to their Covid-era breakthrough “Dreamland”, which got to 2.

12. Deep Purple – “=1”

Their 23rd album. Deep Purple are one of those Ship of Theseus bands who no longer have any original members in the line-up, but three of the current line-up first joined in 1968, so fair enough, really.

14. Los Campesinos! – “All Hell”

Their seventh album, and their first release in seven years. It’s the first time they’ve actually made the album top 40, to my surprise.

28. Morrisson – “British Trap Royalty”

UK rap. It’s his first album and his first appearance on either chart.

33. Childish Gambino – “Bando Stone and the New World”

I’d have thought there’d be more interest in a new Childish Gambino album than this, but he’s never actually been that big on the UK album chart – his all time peak was number 20, and his 2022 album missed the top 75 entirely.