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Feb 2

A Quick Plug

Posted on Tuesday, February 2, 2010 by Al in Shameless Self-Promotion

You’ll have noticed, no doubt, that I’ve been a little quiet on the blogging front for the past few weeks. That’s mainly because of two other writing projects that have been taking up a lot of time. The first of these is something that I can’t talk too openly about just now, but is extremely exciting and if all goes well (and there’s no reason to believe it won’t) I should be able to talk about in around a year or so. The second is something which has now come fully to fruition and is available to buy right now.

Know Your Words is a collection of poems by three previously-unpublished poets, being me and fellow lexonauts Del Des Anges and Amy Kreines. Published through Lulu.com, it’s 170 pages of yummy poetic goodness and I’m hugely proud of it.

It’s got funny poems, sad poems, romantic poems, poems about pirates, poems about Space Invaders, poems about optimism and Ragnarok and the GI Joe movie and the future and glow-in-the-dark monkeys and other such awesomeness. It’s also got a Facebook fan page should you feel like showing support that way.

It’s not comics-related (and I appreciate that poetry, sexy as it is, isn’t everyone’s cup of tea), but if you’ve enjoyed my writing in the past it’s got the same sense of humour so you have a higher than average chance of enjoying this too (and if you haven’t enjoyed my writing then rest assured that Del and Amy are much, much more talented than I am).

EDIT: It’s been pointed out that some kind of indication of the poetry on offer would be helpful, so here’s one of mine as a sample:

Only Swans Can Break Your Arm

Love is like climate change
It makes you warmer by degrees
Love is like a hard drive crash
It brings your system to its knees
Love is like friendly fire
It hits you when you least expect
Love is like a Van Damme flick
It does not play to intellect.
Love is like cupidity
With Cupid in the driver’s seat
Love creates stupidity
So hearts forget to hit each beat
Love is like a hangover;
Your head will ache, your stomach heave
Love’s a televangelist
It tells you what you must believe
Love is like a nuclear bomb
It changes things for years to come
Love is dumb beyond belief
But still we wish we were that dumb.

We now return you to your regularly-scheduled blog.

Bring on the comments

  1. Looks interesting Al. I wish you the best of luck with it (not least because I’m in the final stretches of a similar project and know how stressful it can be getting something like this together).
    I don’t normally bother with poetry, but with material about Space Invaders and the GI Joe movie, how can one resist?

  2. Tom Clarke says:

    I’m tempted, but at £12, I’m going to need a convincer. One sample poem on the site would probably have sold me on it, just as a suggestion of the quality level.
    I mean, I know Al’s funny when gettin’ all angry about Ares TPB’s, but I need to know his poetry scans properly.

  3. Al says:

    And with the magic of Chromakey technology, one appears!

  4. “Love is like a nuclear bomb”

    Apropos of nothing, this cheerful image reminds me of Donald Davie’s “Rejoinder to a Critic,” which I once wrote a paper on.

    What is it with you British people about love and nuclear explosions?

  5. We like anything that looks like willies. 🙂

    //\Oo/\\

  6. Tom Clarke says:

    Well, see, now I’m obliged to buy it. Awesome!

  7. Michael Aronson says:

    Oh, are we now deleting comments that hurt our feelings?

    Before I left a comment that implied the sample poem was awful. Perhaps I should have been more direct: the sample poem is simply atrocious, hinging on simile and simplistic rhyme.

  8. Michael – you appear to have left a post that’s simply atrocious. Stop being a prick.

    KG

  9. Tom Clarke says:

    Michael:
    I asked for a sample for exactly that reason. So that people like you and me could make a decision about buying the book based on what’s in it rather than just being fans of HoA.

    I read it, liked it because it was cute and inventive and reminded me of one of my favourite poets, Roger Mcgough, so I bought the book. Without a sample, I might not have been willing to take that risk.

    You read it, didn’t like it, and thus you can save your money by not buying the book.

    What advantage was there is making a writer feel worse about his work? And why make it less likely that you’ll get free samples in future to decide if the work’s worth buying?

    You might be an awesome poet, but you’re clearly a massive hater. And you’re making life worse for other people.

    Thank you for making me feel sorry for asking for the sample in the first place.

  10. Michael, does it truly surprise you that your trite and insipid attempt at lit crit is unwelcome here? What do you think you’re adding, besides the tang of piss to someone else’s chips? You don’t see Paul going to artists’ blogs to remark, “This comic is terrible! It uses yellow, and cross-hatching!”

    Even if your critique had any depth, it would still be inappropriate. You’re welcome to think that a baby is ugly, but it’s crass to tell the mother you think so. You’d merit a slap for such conduct. Here, you can get off lightly by having your trollish comment deleted. You should take that well-deserved admonishment on the chin.

  11. Paul says:

    Michael, the comment that Al deleted was not “criticism”, it was simply an insult. Stop being a twat. You’re acting like a troll and you’re being treated accordingly.

  12. Jim says:

    I knew there’d be a fight.
    I’m not much into poetry, so I’ll be passing (sorry Al), but I did like the Stacy-X poem ages ago on the podcast.

  13. Michael Aronson says:

    “What advantage was there is making a writer feel worse about his work?”

    I’m not MAKING him do anything. The only thing he should feel bad about (if he chooses to) is his inability to take criticism. In my original comment, I even offered to submit a link of my own work (and that I would welcome such criticism, should I receive it – as I have from you now).

    “You might be an awesome poet, but you’re clearly a massive hater.”

    Funny to hear that kind of language on a site dedicated to giving criticism. I don’t “hate” Al’s poem – I just think it’s awful for the reasons I stated. But what I find worse is his hypocritical attitude toward criticism. A critic is useless if he’s only willing to give and never to take.

    “And you’re making life worse for other people.”

    Let’s spare the melodrama.

  14. AJ says:

    I enjoyed reading the poem to the tune of Saint Etienne.

    Michael: Al’s intention was to simply to post a sample for those who asked for one. Leaving comments that in your own summation “implied the sample poem was awful” is just being a dick to someone who was trying to accomodate the requests of others.

  15. David S. says:

    I saw the original comment before it was deleted. It wasn’t criticism in any way shape or form, it was just insulting. There is a difference between the two.

    Michael I suppose its nice that you’re willing to have your own work scrutinized. Honestly though what would you gain from someone applying your idea of “criticism” to your stuff? “Your work sucks because its stupid, now come check my art out if you’re man enough” isn’t exactly the most thoughtful response you could give to someone else’s work.

  16. Michael Aronson says:

    ““Your work sucks because its stupid, now come check my art out if you’re man enough” isn’t exactly the most thoughtful response you could give to someone else’s work.”

    You’re right. I didn’t post anything like that, though.

  17. Isaac says:

    That was pretty awesome, and made me laugh. Good on you, I’ll have to see about getting a copy. Cheers!

  18. acespot says:

    Michael, if you’re criticizing a writer for their “mis”use of poetry, don’t you think it might be counterproductive for you to ask them for their own critique of YOUR work?

    Just a thought.

    Al, I thought the sample was cute, and I read it to my wife who thought so as well. But…is the title meant to imply a deeper resonance within the poetry? Or is it simply a non sequitur? (To be followed by Horatio putting his sunglasses on…)

  19. Ben Johnston says:

    I like the poem, but I also don’t understand the title.

  20. Lambnesio says:

    I didn’t see the initial comment, but I think it’s worth mentioning that being any sort of artist means opening yourself up to criticism. It’s just part of the game. And the fact is that you need it. Yes-men have never gotten anybody anywhere important, and any worthwhile artist has heard some pretty hurtful things in his/her life. Let’s be clear: Al is not filling up a secret diary; Al is selling a book of his poems. And what’s more, Al is a critic, so I have a feeling that this is something he understands.

    Personally, I think the poem is trite and unoriginal, I don’t think it’s funny, and some of its rhymes were so overwrought and improbable they made me groan.

    Some of you guys obviously liked it. And that’s great. Al can consider on his own what might be working and what might not.

  21. “I didn’t see the initial comment, but I think it’s worth mentioning that being any sort of artist means opening yourself up to criticism.”

    All due respect, but judging from this nonsense, you’re as qualified to teach others about art as a meatpacker is to perform brain surgery; and less so to know criticism from your elbow.

  22. Al says:

    Right, having now left this thread alone for a few days and come back to it, I think it’s probably now just arguments breeding arguments and we should draw a curtain over the whole proceedings. Thank you to everyone for their feedback; be assured that all constructive criticism is taken on board. Back to comics.